 | Memoirs | Jan 11, '08 8:19 AM
for everyone |
 Set me free.Dearest Heartaches, I cannot live with you and I almost certainly cannot live without you. Because without you existing, how would i have had the chance to know the many wonderful memories inside me? I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all. And I'll show you a world that you can understand. This life is filled with hurt, when happiness doesn't work any longer. It makes me want to cry because I had to say Goodbye. By now I should know that in time things would change. By now by now I should know that in time things must grow. And I had to leave you behind. I can't compete with a memory. Sometimes when you look past me, your eyes see someone I can't see. So I've given up this war because I can't fight it anymore. I've kept this multiply site long enough to see all those hidden lies. This page that constantly reminded me about you, us. I couldn't ask for more in this 2 years but To see you re-live your life again even if there wasn't me in the picture. Time and time again, I've told myself it was really time to let go. Perhaps I've been the biggest fool myself. Today I might feel cheated on, lied upon, perhaps played. But tomorrow I'll look at it as a past failure, a lesson learnt. You're an absolutely Great guy. In time, I will learn to forgive. We've been through so much together, I'm glad our roads crossed once. I met you. But it's been far too long for me to stay this way, Exactly 2 years thousands of miles across the oceans. Today I'll officially close this site. Because I've been broken again. And Because there can never be a you and there can never be a me. | Home | Jan 9, '08 2:49 AM
for everyone |
 Bobby and Kelvin
Happy New Year. I love all of you. Yes, You. Tee hee. 
Since when does One's personal life become anothers'? When you wake up, it's going to be gone.
Beneath it all, disappear.
| 1 Month | Nov 18, '07 6:08 PM
for everyone |
We loved with a love that was more than love. | Times | Nov 3, '07 11:37 PM
for everyone |
I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay.
I get by with a little help from my friends. I hope you got all the answers and you've come to understand that people and things are always going to change And you can't stop them now.
Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends.
| Chances | Oct 29, '07 12:06 AM
for everyone |
The unknown and unpredictable element in happenings that seems to have no assignable cause. Today i prayed for my loved ones. I wish they would all be happy where ever they may be,and to have faith to do whatever they wish to pursue in life. Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Love is a choice you make from moment to moment. We need not think alike to love alike. Bridges enable you to get over an obstacle. They help you carry on your journey. In dreams, water symbolises the emotions in your life. There will be no more yesterdays from now. I live for the moment, with much happiness and joy. I'm happy i have you to journey with me along my winding path. Today we start anew. Let's make the best out of it. :)
 Pauline and me
tiffany me bran and pauline
i feel a little lazy to attach pictures to the photos section so i decided to upload into the blog instead. *trying to make it look like Blogspot as much as possible* hahaha.. yes. thats me, amy and Shaun. Familiar faces ey? They are also in Perth. Staying with me. ;D Also, we went to Tk's birthday party. oh wells, i am missing my friends in Kuching. I wanna go back.      Its been more than a year since my last update entry in this multiply site.Things have definately changed from when i was 16.Now Im already18. ;) But life in these 2 years has been great. I felt feelings i never thought i cud have felt. And i gave everything i cud to make him happy. ;) You know i do understand now why some people say they never want to grow up. Growing up means u have to bear responsibilities. You have to always impress everyone around you. You have to decide on things that not only effect your life but also their lifes. Most of all you have to decide on things that will make them happy, whether or not to look good but it HAS always been to look GOOD. ;( I decided to let go some things in life probably for the better. We make memories out of every little thing around us. People we truly love. Perhaps, just perhaps one day, i will get hold of that moment in time again. Running into someone who brings light, joy and influence to your life is somewhat destined. It's as if its God's will to perfect us into a decent human being, to be able to complete this marathon. It is not by luck, neither by love by first sight but the hard work placed by the two people to make everything work wonderfully and to earn the happiness they had. It is not pure luck that brings to people together, it is fate.
Saying goodbye is really hard, but to continue our lives, we can't have everything we want. Who said we could? We have only two hands after all. If it's full, let something go. We can't juggle with life can we? It will reach to the point one day that you have to choose between two things of equal importance. Continuing means letting go of something precious we wished we could have kept.
I wish it could have worked out differently.
2006 Stanley and me before Perth. Why do we have to part while the
love is
still there?
Why do we have to suffer?
Why do we have to cry when somebody bids
goodbye?
Why do beginnings have an end?
Why do we have to meet only to lose in the
end?
There are questions left unanswered, words
left unsaid, letters left unread, poems left
undone, songs left unsung, love left
unexpressed, promises left unfulfilled.
In a relationship, one of the hardest things to
do is saying goodbye and letting go.
It is as hard as breaking a crystal because
you'll never know when you will be able to
pick up the pieces again.
More often than not, they who go, feel not the
pain of parting: it is they who stay behind that
suffer, because they are left with memories
of a love that was meant to be, a love that
was.
At the beginning and at the end of a
relationship, we are embarrassed to find
ourselves alone.
Unfair as it may seem, but that's the way love
goes.
That's the drama, the bittersweet and the risk
of falling in love.
After all, nothing is constant but change.
Everything will eventually come to its end
without us knowing when, without us
knowing how, without us even knowing why.
And we must forget not because we have to
but because we have to.
In letting go, sorrows come not as a single
spy but in batallion.
It seems that everywhere you go, everything
you do, every song you hear, every turn of
your head, every move of your body, every
beat of your heart, every blink of your eye and
every breath you take always reminds you of
him.
It's like a stab of a knife, a torture in the night.
Funny how the whole world becomes
depopulated when only one person is
missing.
Just imagine, there are billion people on
earth and yet it seems you feel lonely and
empty without the other.
I don't know if it's worth calling an art, but
letting go entails special skills sparkled with
a considerable space and time.
Time heals all wounds but it takes a little
push on our part.
Acceptance plays a part.
Not all love stories end with "...and they live
happily ever after."
Sometimes we have to part because of
circumstances beyond our control.
We have to suffer if it would mean happiness
for others.
We have to cry to temporarily let go of the
pains.
Every beginning has its end like every dawn
has its dusk.
It's something we can't control, something
we had to live up.
It's over. He's gone. But life has to go on.
Goodbye doesn't always mean forever.
There will always be a place and time where
questions will be answered, words will be
spoken, letters will be read, poems will be
recited in the night, songs will be sung in
harmony, love will be expressed in solitude
and promises will be fulfilled.
Somewhere. Somehow. Someday."
"Some of us think holding on makes us
strong; but sometimes it is letting go" A little girl and her father were crossing a flimsy
bridge.The father was kind of scared so he asked
his little
daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my hand so
that you don't fall into the river."
The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my
hand." "What's the difference?" asked the puzzled
father.
"There's a big difference," replied the little girl.
"If I hold your hand and something happens to me,
chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you
hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what
happens, you will never let my hand go."
In any relationship, the essence of trust is not in its
bind , age, caste or creed but in its bond. So hold
the hand of the person whom you love rather than
expecting them to hold
I thought sometime alone
was what we really needed
you said this time would hurt more than it helps
but I couldn't see that
I thought it was the end
of a beautiful story
and so I left the one I loved at home to be alone
and I tried to find
out if this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart
I'd rather have bad times with you, than good
times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and
warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it
easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
And then I met someone
and thought he could replace you
we got a long just fine
we wasted time because he was not you
we had a lot of fun
though we knew we were faking
love was not impressed with our connection they
were all lies, all lies
so I'm here cause I found this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart
I'd rather have bad times with you, than good
times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and
warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it
easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
who holds my heart
I can't blame you if you turn away from me, like I've
done you,
I can only prove the things I say with time,
please be mine,
I'd rather have bad times with you,
than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm
than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times to gether,
than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
Yeah, to the ONE who holds my heart...
One day, Plato asked his teacher, "What is
love?
How can I find it?"
His teacher answered, "There is a vast wheat
field
in front. Walk forward without turning back, and
pick only one stalk. If you find the most
magnificent stalk, then you have found love."
Plato walked forward, and before long, he
returned
with empty hands, having picked nothing.
His teacher asked, "Why did you not pick any
stalk?"
Plato answered,"Because I could only pick
once,
and yet I could not turn back. I did find the most
magnificent stalk, but did not know if there were
anybetter ones ahead, so I did not pick it. As I
walked further, the stalks that I saw were not
as
good as the earlier one, so I did not pick any in
the
end.
His teacher then said, "And that is love."
The next day, Plato asked his teacher, "What
is
marriage? How can I find it?"
His teacher answered, "There is a thriving
forest in
front. Walk forward without turning back, and
chop
down only one tree. If you find the tallest tree,
then
you have found marriage".
Plato walked forward, and before long, he
returned
with a tree. The tree was not thriving, and it
was
not tall either. It was only an ordinary tree.
His teacher asked "Why did you chop down
such
anordinary tree?"
Plato answered, "Because of my previous
experience. I had walked through the field, but
returned with empty hands. This time, I saw this
tree, and I felt that it was not bad, so I chopped
it
down and brought it back. I did not want to miss
the opportunity."
His teacher then said, "And that is marriage."
"You see son, Love is the most beautiful thing
to
happen to a person, it's an opportunity but you
don't realise its worth when you have it but only
when it's gone like the field of stalks.
Marriage like the tree you chopped, it's a
compromise."
So my dear friends.. realize what you
have..appreciate and cherish it...
Nice words is nothing without heart..
Thoughts is nothing without actions..
Seek to love, not to be loved...
Seek to care, not to be cared...
Seek to understand, not to be understood...
| |
with Ciaro, Ryan, Allan and Queenie Bean
With Bobby and Joshua
With Hilda